Happy Labor Day

I was due with our first little boy on May 14. On April 30 I had been feeling what I thought to be more braxton hicks contractions than usual. The feelings continued and in the back of mind I kept thinking, "what if this is it?" At my doctor's appointment that week I had only been slightly dilated, and I had heard from many people that with your first baby it's less likely to give birth early, so I went to bed thinking tomorrow would be another normal day. It was supposed to be my last day of teaching before starting my maternity leave.

Around 3 am I woke up for my regular middle of the night bathroom break. Only this time it wouldn't be so normal. When I sat up, I felt a sudden stream of water. I wondered if I had wet my pants! How embarrassing I thought. As I shook off my sleepiness and went to the bathroom I knew by the looks of things that my water had broken. I was suddenly filled with excitement. I went to the living room wondering what I should do. I sat for a while, prayed, got giddy, and then remembered that the doctor said to call when my water broke. After talking to the doctor, my husband who had still been sleeping emerged from the bedroom wondering who I was talking to. I had decided not to wake him because I wanted him to get his sleep and be rested for what lie ahead. We then decided to go back to sleep. For a woman who's water just broke, and she knows she's going to be having a baby that day, sleep was not so easy. My adrenaline had already started pumping. That next morning I wasn't feeling any notable contractions. We went walking in hopes of getting things going. After talking with the doctor more, she wanted us to come in around 1:00 that afternoon. I realized that I didn't have any nursing bras, and I insisted that we go shopping and to Chick-fil-a. We checked into the hospital at 2:00.

They got me ready with the mandatory saline lock. This was almost worse than the labor. They couldn't find a suitable vein and had to stick me a lot. My contractions were still weak and far apart, so Luke and I went to walking. My contractions would become stronger as we walked but would slow back down each time I had to be checked. The talk started turning to pitocin, which I didn't want. We told the doctor that we wanted to wait, so the power-walking continued. I'm sure we tracked several miles before the night was over. Around 6pm, with little progress still being made, the doctor felt that it was time for pitocin. We decided to go ahead with it, and I soon was feeling the uncomfortable labor. I had to have a fetal heart monitor on, but thankfully we were able to continue walking. When the contractions intensified, I spent most of the time on the birth ball. My husband was great at supporting me and encouraging me through the contractions. I found that the thing that helped me cope with and focus was to hum hymns. Our birth instructor had told us that each woman finds their own pain management once they are in labor, and that was mine. As my body started to go through transition, I felt nauseous and then threw up. I had started feeling more pressure in the lowest part of my back. My nurse asked me if I felt the need to push, but I really didn't know. She walked out, and I had a major contraction, she walked back in a minute later, and said "by the looks of that contraction, you're ready."

I got situated in the bed and did my first pushing. I had not realized how hard and exhausting pushing would be. My nurse left us to go get my doctor. She told Luke and I that with the next contraction I should go ahead and push. We laughed to ourselves that we had to do this alone. Luke took on the role as doctor and counted me through the next contractions. With the doctor in place, the pushing continued. I pushed over the course of 50 minutes. As Nathan crowned I experienced pain like never before. I know understood why it is called, "the ring of fire" Crazy! At 11:50 on May 1 every second of pain became worth it as Nathan was placed in my arms. My heart expanded to an understanding of love I had not yet known.

Because of some tearing the doctor sewed me up. This was my least favorite part of the whole birth. After that, they cleaned Nathan up in our room and did all the necessary checks on the baby. We then had our first time alone together as a family...awesome!

In the end, I was so thankful for how everything happened. I amazed myself at coping with the contractions and managing the pain without an epidural (thank you God). I did however learn a couple of things.
1. God has created our bodies to do this amazingly beautiful thing
2. If my water breaks with the next pregnancy, I will wait to call my doctor and will wait to go into the hospital until I'm further along.
3. My husband is my best labor coach!

I would love to read your birth stories. You can link up over at Amy's Finer Things.

Nathan Luke Stevenson
May 1, 2009
6lbs. 9 0z.

The many hats we wear

Tonight my son, Nathan, reminded me once again that as a mom, you wear many hats. My hat tonight was throw up cleaner upper. This would not seem like a big deal and not terribly disgusting had it been HIS throw up. Instead, it was the throw up of a perfect stranger that my son found in a small spot on the floor of a shoe store. Oh the joys! I know there will be many more disgusting moments in my future as a mom to a curious little boy. Despite the gross factor, it's all worth it because it's all these moments put together that make me stronger as a mother. Each hat that we wear whether it be chauffeur, boo-boo kisser, diaper changer, cook, janitor, and yes, even throw up cleaner upper, it's all done out of love, and the job comes with many perks. So, what hat are you wearing today?

Enjoying our children

I'm back from a 9 day vacation refreshed and relaxed. It was a restful time with family and friends, except for the 1 1/2 days of teething hell that fell in the middle of our week. By the grace of God it only lasted that long! I seriously went to my knees one afternoon asking for God's rest and relief for Nathan's pain, crying, and clinginess. Praise God for his help. Other than that, I enjoyed reading, tanning, napping, sitting in the surf, and being cut off from the internet and normal routines that usually take my attention away from my family. There really is something wonderful about feeling free to do nothing. Now I only need to muster up the motivation to get back on track and get things done.While on vacation, I had time to chew on some thoughts that have been simmering in my mind. One has to do with motherhood. I have to say that I never had really thought about what kind of mother I wanted to be when I had kids. I knew of course that I wanted to set an example of a woman who puts God first and loves them with a patient, passionate, deliberate kind of love. I hadn't thought of how I would handle the daily ins and outs of motherhood. In those early days of motherhood, I read several books about how to set a schedule and routine for your baby, how to make wholesome baby food, etc. I soon found myself a little stressed out (can you say hormones?) about trying to live up to a certain standard and do things the way the books were telling me. While, I have since loosened up a lot, I still have to remind myself often to stop and just enjoy being a mom. In the book I've been reading, A Woman After God's Own Heart, I was reminded of this. God wants us to delight in our children, not just raise them. We need to step back from our expectations of how they are to act, what they are to eat, when they are to develop each skill and simply enjoy God's most precious gift to us. If this means not reading books, blogs, and websites about raising kids, do it. While there is a wealth of information out there, it can sometimes be overwhelming and leave us second guessing everything that we do. I also feel that I've learned a valuable lesson : STOP criticizing how other moms do things and STOP comparing yourself to other moms. God has appointed YOU as the mother of your child. He knows that you are exactly what your precious one needs. Seek his counsel daily (He's way smarter than the authors of those books). I hope any moms that read this will be encouraged in your most privileged role. Now go, enjoy your little ones!